* This is a true story. The pleasure is immense reliving mid-November 1980 – I was 12 years old when “Kiss” arrived in Melbourne, Australia for their concert at Waverley (V.F.L) Park.


‘Jump,’ the older boys looked my way and screamed.
I trembled with fear as I hung from the top of the six foot wire fence.
‘Come on Kon, you either jump the fence or we go to see “Kiss” without you,’ they gave me their final warning.
‘Oh shit,’ I yelled the moment I turned my head to see Mr. Sutton, the college custodian, moving in our direction.
‘What’s going on?’ they wondered as they stared into the distance.
‘Look over there, the old man has seen us,’ I announced quite scared.
‘Holy crap, we are in big trouble now,’ much to my surprise the boys in a state of panic screamed before they took off without me.
‘What are you doing, get down from there this instant,’ the old snitch shrieked as he continued to limp his way in my direction.
That moment I knew it, I had no other choice but to climb down that fence if I stood a chance of not getting caught.
‘Wait for me,’ I begged as I finally found the power to climb my way down the fence.
Boy did I ever find it difficult to keep up with those boys. Despite the fact that I ran my heart out, I proved no match for their power and speed. The reason for this was that the rest of the guys were all seventeen year olds. I was the little and scrawny twelve-year old from sixth grade. I ran and ran until I finally managed to catch up with them in the park across the road from Cabrini Hospital.
‘We thought you wouldn’t make it,’ Andrew remarked as he pulled out a cigarette.
‘Why did you abandon me?’ I managed to complain with great difficulty because I was almost out of breath.
‘What did you want us to do? Stand around for Sutton to arrive and recognize us?’ George asked quite frustrated.
‘What if he did?’ I wondered quite scared.
‘Let’s not think about it. Say, where can we leave our bags?’ Mark wanted to know.
‘We can drop them off in the garage of my home,’ I provided a quick solution.
‘Do you live close by?’
‘My house happens to be just around the corner,’ I announced before I started to show them the way.
We dropped our bags in my father’s garage (I’d be dead meat if they found out!). The four of us then made our way towards Malvern station when Andrew came up with a brilliant idea.
‘How much money do we have?’
‘I have $3.50,’ I announced as I held out a handful of coins for them to see.
‘I have $5.00,’ Mark said.
‘I have $2.80,’ George remarked.
‘I have $16.00!’ Andrew went on to say.
‘How the hell did you manage to find $16.00?’ we asked quite surprised.
‘Not a big deal, I took them from my sister’s purse! We have a total of twenty seven dollars and thirty cents. This money is more than enough for us to take a taxi to the Airport, buy drinks and tickets for our return. What do you say?’
‘Great idea,’ we immediately agreed as we stood dressed in school uniforms and waited for a taxi to pass by.
‘There’s one,’ Mark screamed with enthusiasm and we started to indicate to the driver to stop.
‘We want to go to Melbourne Airport,’ Andrew told the driver as soon as he pulled over.
‘Do you boys have money?’ the driver asked.
‘We do.’
‘Get in,’ the driver said...



We arrived at Melbourne Airport at 10:30 a.m. Television and newspaper reports stated: “The American super group “Kiss” was scheduled to arrive in Melbourne at 11:00 a.m.”
The atmosphere was more than electrifying. There we where, four brave and rebellious kids who had made the decision to skip school with the hope of seeing “Kiss”. We tried to do everything in our power to squash our way through hundreds, if not thousands, of screaming fans who were there for the same reason as us – to make our dream come true by welcoming and getting a glimpse of their heroes – Gene, Paul, Ace and Eric.

‘What do you want shrimp?’ a tall, long-haired guy looked down at me quite disturbed after I accidentally bumped into him.
‘I’m terribly sorry Sir,’ I replied quite scared as I continued to move through the crowd.



The deafening screams of “We want Kiss, we want Kiss…” could be heard throughout the main waiting area as fans of all ages waited with great anticipation for their heroes to appear. Little did we know that the television and newspaper reports were soon to prove inaccurate. The band members had in fact been transferred from the Airport to the hotel in utmost secrecy to avoid the hysterical fans and last but not least the disturbing members of the press.
It was two hours later when an Airport official came out to confirm our worst fears and doubts. “Kiss” was not at the airport and our dream did not come true.
‘We came all this way for nothing,’ Mark screamed.
The situation started to get nasty. The feeling that prevailed was one of anger and disappointment. I noticed some older guys screaming at security guards, others refused to make their way out of the waiting room before they were practically dragged out by Police Officers.
‘Let’s get out of here,’ Andrew remarked as he moved my skinny body to the side in order to avoid a possible stampede.
Without wasting any time we headed back to the main city area by bus before we boarded a train at Flinders St. station. All four dispirited souls got off at Malvern station. The boys followed me home in order to pick up their school bags.
‘Should we go back to school?’ I asked.
‘You must be crazy mate,’ Andrew remarked.
‘Why do you say this?’ I wondered.
‘The teachers will be extremely suspicious if we turned up for the last two hours of class. It’s best we go tomorrow and pretend as if nothing had occurred,’ Andrew suggested.
At this moment George asked if he could use my toilet.
‘No way mate! Don’t let him use your toilet,’ Mark screamed.
‘Why not?’ I asked.
‘The last time he used my toilet our whole house stunk for a week.’
‘And where am I going to do my pee?’ George inquired quite desperate.
‘Let him use your toilet before he floods the yard,’ Andrew told me as I inserted the key to open the back door of my home.
Moments later George came out with a smile.
‘Are you done?’ Andrew asked.
‘Yeah, thank goodness,’ he remarked quite relieved as they started to leave the house.


The following day

‘We trust you told no one about yesterday?’ Andrew appeared before me.
‘Not a soul,’ I replied as I shook my head right and left.

It was at this instant when my heart started beating quite fast when an announcement was heard over the loud speakers.

‘May I have your attention please? All students and personnel are required to gather at the main hall in five minutes.’

‘Good, its best we keep it that way,’ Andrew remarked quite pleased as he escorted me towards the student hall.
‘Yeah sure, whatever you say,’ I reassured him.
‘If you happen to need something or if someone harasses you, come to me and I’ll take care of it,’ Andrew made me feel safe and placed his arm on my shoulder.
‘Thank you mate,’ I replied with a smile of satisfaction as we took our seats and waited in silence for the school headmaster to take the stand.

Good morning to all students and members of the staff. I have called this meeting to inform you of a serious violation that occurred here yesterday. It has come to my attention that during the first recess break, our custodian Mr. Sutton happened to come across four students while they were attempting to leave the school premises. What disturbs me most is that these four individuals climbed the rear fence and continued on their way despite Mr. Sutton’s warning.
I call upon those four individuals to rise and reveal themselves. Come on gentlemen, we know who you are. Attendance for all classes was verified before the last two periods – while you were absent. You have thirty seconds to come forward if you do not wish to be expelled.

The headmaster’s thundering voice demanded as he waited for the perpetrators to appear.
Andrew got up first, so too did George and Mark who followed closely behind.
‘The fourth member of the gang has exactly ten seconds to come forward and reveal himself before I call his parents and have him expelled,’ the Headmaster insisted.
My legs were shaking as I left my seat. I felt like I had lost the ground from under my feet as I moved through the aisle to take the stand.
‘Thank you for joining us,’ the headmaster looked at me and remarked ironically.
He demanded from us to position ourselves in a straight line so the whole student body could get to see our now more than scared faces.
‘Can you tell us the reason why you decided to jump the fence and escape the school premises?’
‘We went to the Airport,’ Mark confessed as he trembled with fear.
‘The Airport?’ the Headmaster inquired.
‘Yes Sir,’ Andrew confirmed.
‘May I ask what kind of class you attended at the airport? Come on, speak up,’ the Headmaster demanded.
I was completely overtaken by fear as he moved my way.
‘Why don’t you tell us?’ he demanded as he looked me deep in the eyes.
‘We were hoping to see “Kiss”.
‘Is that true?’ the Headmaster turned to ask Andrew.
‘Yes Sir,’ was all Andrew could say once again.
Suddenly, the Headmaster gave him a slap across the face. The poor boy did two and a half summersaults before he landed on the floor head first. He then moved sideways to face and confront Mark before he lifted his hand and landed it on his pimple faced skin. The boy hit the floor faster than the speed of light.
There I was standing in line fearing for my turn when George saved him the trouble of lifting his arm. George dropped to the floor like a sack of potatoes – the boy had passed out with his tongue sticking out.
‘Why are you crying?’ the headmaster wondered as I stood in front of him and the entire school sulking like a baby.
‘I don’t know Sir,’ I said to him with the pitiful face of a twelve year old.
‘Have I hit you?’ he asked.
‘No,’ I replied the moment the ruthless soul applied all his power to give me a “forget me not” slap that echoed across the student hall.
Despite the tears, despite the pain, despite the humiliation, I managed to achieve one thing the other boys didn’t – I was like a seesaw moving left and right, back and forth but I did not fall. The Headmaster gave me a second slap but still I remained on my feet while the other boys continued to lie on the floor. I felt my head and eyes spinning. To this day, I still wonder how I managed to stay on my feet.

‘You’re a strange kind of chap,’ he remarked as he usually did when he wanted to make me feel different from everybody else.
The rest of the student body and staff sat speechless. As for the students, they knew they better not move or utter one word – they were to get the same treatment if they dared!
‘Why don’t we go see what else it is you are hiding in your locker?’ he said.
We moved toward the main locker room area while the whole school followed.
‘Open it up,’ he demanded in an impatient manner.
My fingers trembled as they moved down my pocket to find the key.
‘What is this garbage?’ the Headmaster screamed with anger the moment he saw the inside of my locker decorated with “Kiss” photos, newspaper articles, mini posters and stickers.
‘I promise to dispose of it immediately,’ I said in an attempt to save my belongings.
‘You will do no such thing. I will destroy these evil icons once and for all.’
‘Please Sir, these mini posters happen to be limited editions from “T.V. Week” magazine,’ I begged for mercy as I fell to my knees.
‘You are so blinded by this evil group. You can’t see that your mind and soul have been poisoned. These demons can only lead you to your doom. Mark my words: “It won’t be long before you start using chemicals and substances. In less than five years from now you will be involved in violence, armed robberies, even possible murder”’ the ass said to me.
He tore the “Kiss” photos into hundreds of tiny pieces before he ended up throwing them in the air and came down the same way confetti falls over the crowd during “Rock’ n’ roll all nite”.
‘Pick up your filth,’ he demanded with satisfaction before he moved away.

The coming months proved to be some of the best times at school – I became the success story and pride of the student body. Everyone imitated my seesaw movement for months to come and kept asking how did I manage to remain standing. I just basked in the glory of surviving one of my best experiences as a child!
 
*Headmaster James:
If you by chance happen to read this, I want you to know that my actions proved you wrong. I am still a fan of “Kiss” and I did not end up consuming chemicals and substances like you had predicted. Nor did I take part in armed robberies and murders of any kind.
On the contrary I worked hard to build my own home. I recently got married and I have an almost six month old daughter. Plus, I’m a writer of science fiction, fiction, comedy and real life events.
I hope to see the day when my writings: ‘Erpetors’, ‘The Escape’, ‘The Children of the Tunnel’, ‘The Elimination’, ‘Hotel Story’, and ‘The Great Steal’, become movies and/or T.V. shows.
Headmaster James, I am so glad you were so wrong!


*KISS
I have been a fan ever since 1979. Thank you for being there. Thank you for carrying on and entertaining me all these years.
And although the memories are endless, I can never get enough of you. The world will be in for many dull decades of rock’ n’ roll when times comes for you to call it a day.


A “forever” kiss fan,

Kon Mosh
November 13, 2008